"Columbia, this is Houston
-- Are you ready to start glutial stimulation experiments?"
"Roger, Houston," answered
Mission Commander Joel Mason, "everything here is a 'go.'"
Joel, and the other
five crewmembers looked at me as I started to detach the fasteners
on my space suit.
Experiments, indeed!" I thought. NASA was concerned about the effects
of prolonged space flight, and how it affects human physiology.
They knew that physical stimulation was a key element in keeping
muscles toned, and in the production of enzymes and other body chemicals
needed for the healthy operation of a human being.
The bottom line was,
they wanted to know if spanking could be used to counter the effects
of weightlessness. I was lucky enough to be the spankee. What a
girl won't go through to get a shot at a shuttle mission!
Joel was selected (after
much auditioning with other members of the crew) to administer the
spanking. Janice, the crew's biologist was selected as back-up spanker
in the event Joel could not complete the mission as assigned.
Like everything else
NASA does, we rehearsed spanking over and over in the simulator.
Although a number of spanking techniques were demonstrated during
training, the only one authorized for this experiment was an open-hand,
bare-ass, over-the-knee spanking.
That's just the problem.
In orbit, there's no gravity to hold you on someone's knee. I thought
of this as my naked form floated past Joel. I balled-up and twisted
to present myself posterior-first to him. I wanted my backside to
come at him like a "balloon pitch" in softball. That is, a big,
fat pitch that's easy to hit.
Not that my ass is big
and fat, but it's one of the larger ones on the crew. Maybe that's
why *I* was picked.
Joel made a resounding,
solid contact with my buns. I grabbed my knees tighter to keep from
opening up. His hit was a little off-center and sent me spinning
around the crew compartment.
Joel waited for me to
rotate back into position and delivered a blow to my other cheek,
this one calculated to counteract the first.
It worked -- somewhat.
I was now rotating slower. Joel adapted rapidly. With an extra free
hand -- one not used to steady me as it would in a terrestrial spanking,
he started spanking me with both hands. He alternated cheeks and
had me rocking back and forth.
He slowly worked me
from one end of the compartment to the other this way, dribbling
my cheeks like basketballs. When we got to the end, he gave me one
final swat to turn me around, got behind me, and dribbled me back
across the court.
All the events were
photographed both by the on-board cameras and by crew-operated,
hand-held cameras. Every vital sign was transmitted via telemetry
back to Houston where scores of doctors were already analyzing the
effect Joel's spanking had on me.
I wondered if this experiment
would make the 11 o'clock news.